The Courage of My Liver

There is a pain in my torso as I write this. Last week, one of the liver support supplements I take ran out before I ordered a new jar. “It’ll be fine,” I thought to myself. I was wrong.

As I placed my order online, I realized that this thread of recovery regarding my liver perfectly reflected the overall tapestry of my experience with Chronic Fatigue.

First nobody knew what was causing the pain in my side. Then a doctor in 2008 figured out that it was my liver. Looking back I realize that when I was on a daily regimen in 2006 which included inhaling glutathione and N-Acetyl-Cysteine as prescribed by Dr. Young, this must have really helped my liver. But after keeping up being on a nebulizer every day for over a year, I couldn’t make myself go back. Continue reading

The Story of D-Ribose

In the Fall of 2010, my supply of D-Ribose lapsed for a few days. I’d been taking it every day since July 2008 and was surprised to see how much I deteriorated without it. My mental stamina tanked, I began to feel increasingly disoriented, and my body was hurting and stiffening, more and more. I’d forgotten how bad, bad used to be!

Then I remembered what I had read about D-Ribose and realized I needed to ask for help. A very kind friend drove to Whole Foods and got me an expensive jar of the white powder to tide me over until my online order arrived. Here’s the story, extracted from an article by Dr. Teitelbaum, that led to my trying D-Ribose in the first place. It may seem a little technical at first but it gets really good.

D-Ribose - A Very Powerful and Natural Body Energizer

by Jacob Teitelbaum, M.D.

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A Word about Trauma, Chronic Fatigue & Fibromyalgia

“The only time I’ve seen results this bad was with a patient who told me stories like, “My mother got me through the Holocaust and when we made it to the States she killed herself.”"

By 2008, I was being treated by a department at California Pacific Medical Center that specializes in complex cases. One of the first things they did was a neurotransmitter test and their reaction to my test results clued me in to the connection between trauma and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

I looked back at my life. What could equal the Holocaust combined with a mother’s suicide? It was obvious to me that as a young child, I had experienced my parents’ divorce in a traumatic way. It wasn’t the fact that they divorced; it was the way they didn’t appear to hold anything back in using me against each other. I imagine that when I continued to do well at school (albeit a little less so), the effects of their behavior on me were too subtle to get their attention.  Continue reading

Zeeq

“I will call you from time to time,” Zeeq said.

“How will you do that?” Maureen asked.

Stop. Freeze frame. Before I recount any more of this story, I must emphasize that I can scarcely believe it myself. As I prepared to write today, I considered going back to the recordings of my sessions with Maureen. But that’s not necessary. I remember the parts that I am relaying here. And anyway, I am saving my energy for writing. Play on…  Continue reading

Reason Departed

His hand was literally on the handle of my front door. “Wait,” I said, feeling really silly. “I have one more question.”

“Morgan” came back into my apartment and I asked him a question I thought I’d never pose, even to myself.

It had all begun when I noticed a book sitting on a shelf in my Classical Acupuncturist‘s office and asked to borrow it. Soon I had finished reading Many Lives Many Masters and was rather obsessively borrowing Brian Weiss‘ other books from my local library.

“Uh oh,” I thought to myself. “I’ve seen this before. What’s about to happen this time?”

In 1994, I obsessively began reading books about near death experiences. “I can’t take this anymore,” my friend Aaron said, after I commented for the umpteenth time that I felt like something big was about to happen. “I think you should talk to somebody.”  Continue reading

Epiphany on Classical Acupuncture & Chronic Fatigue

“All this time I thought I had Chronic Fatigue,” Jackie said as a light bulb seemed to appear over her head.

I was at a new dentist this week after accepting that I wasn’t going to make it to Palo Alto, where my dentist of over ten years is located. Jackie was taking X-rays of my mouth while she asked me questions about the condition that was causing me to snack intermittently. At one point, I said something about how the fatigue wasn’t the worst part – although that’s bad enough. But it’s the difficulty recovering, including the inability to sleep though wiped out, that’s the toughest.

That was when Jackie had her moment. Like many people she struggles with her energy level but, unlike this Chronic Fatigue patient, she rests and returns to normal.  Continue reading

Chelation Therapy & Chronic Fatigue

 

Looking back on it now, I don’t know why I was so upset. It was merely another step in my recovery journey. I guess at the time it felt like my life was over…

When “Dr. Jordan” suggested testing me for heavy metals, I assumed the results would be negative. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to do the test. We could cross that off the list of possibilities and move on to the next thing. By now, I knew I had Chronic Fatigue and I knew that while the pH Miracle treatment protocol had helped me tremendously, there was still a missing piece in my recovery puzzle. But finding out that the mercury, cadmium, arsenic and lead levels in my body were off the charts had not been part of my plan.  Continue reading

One Liter, Three Scoops, Ten Drops

The secret to a diet that allows me the most energy seems to be eating mostly vegetables, especially the green ones. Add a number of energy supplements, the most important of which is d-ribose, and presto: I am nutritionally supported for CFS/FMS recovery!

It’s such a simple idea but the execution of my diet gets complicated when you consider the fact that I’m talking seventy percent vegetables on my plate. Those are vegetables that need to be bought, washed, stored and prepared. This requires coordinating and surviving MISSION GROCERY STORE; standing long enough in the kitchen to wash, chop, blend, steam or cook them in broth; cleaning up after eating.  Continue reading

The Limits of Logic in Healing Chronic Fatigue & Fibromyalgia

I was in a flat somewhere in Edinburgh, Scotland when I got into a conversation about Euclidean geometry. My fellow undergraduate was studying mathematics (I was getting a Bachelor’s in chemistry), and had just learned a system of mapping three dimensional space using circles. This meant that what we had all been taught as children – x, y and z axes that were straight lines – was merely a particular way of looking at things. It had come from Euclid‘s approach to describing shapes mathematically. Instead of looking at space as being made of cubes and straight lines, you can look at it as circles and spheres. What we’d been taught as the way to map 3D space was actually just one way, based on one man’s theory. Whoa.

Then there’s the theory of light. First Newton said rays of light were made up of a series of particles or corpuscles (the corpuscular theory of light). My memory gets a little sketchy here but I believe this competed with a wave theory of light for a while. Sometime in the nineteenth century, someone set up an experiment to test which theory was correct. The wave theory correctly predicted the results of the experiment and won the day until Einstein came along. I can’t tell you what is happening on the pioneering edge of physics today but I do know that as recently as when I was in high school (or not so recently) quantum physics helped us to equate the corpuscular nature with the wave-like nature of light. Whenever I solved problems in Advanced-level physics, I knew how to choose which equations to use based on which aspect of light I was dealing with.  Continue reading

Cancer? No, I Just Need a Chronic Fatigue Doctor

Or, Diagnosis Part IV

Cancer Scare Number Four

“Casey’s” body language was not matching her words. He was my new, naturopathic doctor and she was saying things like he “just wanted to be sure” and that he wanted me to see someone who knew more about this. But it was Friday and she’d already made a Monday appointment for me to see another doctor. Plus, she was moving around the room with an urgency that made me suspicious.

“Just tell me,” I insisted. “I won’t hold you to it.” Clearly something was on his mind. Clearly she had an opinion on what this latest test result meant.

“It could mean liver or bone cancer.”

I looked at him uncomprehendingly. Then my mind did a quick calculation. Liver or bone? Aren’t those the worst places to get cancer? How did I get here? Again? Continue reading