Tag Archives: Spirituality

Brushing My Teeth to Healing

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I put some toothpaste on my toothbrush, and raised the brush to my mouth.

“Oh Gawd,” I thought to myself. “Again with brushing my teeth?”

And that’s how it was. Everyday things were such a struggle that it had become a thing. At one point, I had to start my day by brushing my teeth, then lie down for a while, then wash my face. Showers were carefully timed for days when nothing else was imperative. This was better than when I couldn’t get out of bed but it was hard to feel any gratitude.  Continue reading →

Learning to Pause

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Learn to pause … or nothing worthwhile will catch up to you.

–Doug King

The above quote gave me, well, pause! Is this what CFS is here to teach me? Maybe that’s what “Morgan” meant when he said I was experiencing a “reality check.”

I’m determined to make good use of this lesson. And when I get further with figuring out how, I’ll tell you all about it!

It’s amazing – the mere process of pursuing this intention is already beginning to reduce my anxiety. See you soon.

First Came the Dream…

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The dream itself didn’t seem unusual. But I woke up that day in July 2009, really struck by it. It had an insistent quality to it like someone knocking hard on a door to get your attention.

Have you ever had a physical? In my experience, it looks like any other doctor’s appointment. The doctor asks a few questions, orders a few tests. In Hollywood movies however, they seem to involve the patient on a treadmill, hooked up by wires to monitors that are observed by a technician. My dream looked rather like a physical in a Hollywood movie.  Continue reading →

Zeeq

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“I will call you from time to time,” Zeeq said.

“How will you do that?” Maureen asked.

Stop. Freeze frame. Before I recount any more of this story, I must emphasize that I can scarcely believe it myself. As I prepared to write today, I considered going back to the recordings of my sessions with Maureen. But that’s not necessary. I remember the parts that I am relaying here. And anyway, I am saving my energy for writing. Play on…  Continue reading →

Chance, Fate & Chronic Fatigue

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The idea came to me like a whisper in my ear. I had picked up my latest Brian Weiss book at the library but was too excited to return home immediately. So I stayed and began reading.

In the middle of the quiet library afternoon, I heard, “Call Parker.”

I had already decided to try Regression Therapy after my encounter with Morgan and was looking for a suitable therapist. But I did not want to call “Parker”!  Continue reading →

Reason Departed

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His hand was literally on the handle of my front door. “Wait,” I said, feeling really silly. “I have one more question.”

“Morgan” came back into my apartment and I asked him a question I thought I’d never pose, even to myself.

It had all begun when I noticed a book sitting on a shelf in my Classical Acupuncturist‘s office and asked to borrow it. Soon I had finished reading Many Lives Many Masters and was rather obsessively borrowing Brian Weiss‘ other books from my local library.

“Uh oh,” I thought to myself. “I’ve seen this before. What’s about to happen this time?”

In 1994, I obsessively began reading books about near death experiences. “I can’t take this anymore,” my friend Aaron said, after I commented for the umpteenth time that I felt like something big was about to happen. “I think you should talk to somebody.”  Continue reading →

Why Ask Why?

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I could feel the panic rising inside me. It was 2007 and I had finally found out what was wrong with me after two years. But this had the effect of burning up my savings faster as I pursued treatment. It was like running at top speed towards the edge of a cliff. You need momentum in order to have a chance of taking off into the air. But you might fall over the edge. To make matters worse, my improvement appeared to be stalling.

There was nothing else to do except call Tracy Beckerley. “Why did I get Chronic Fatigue?” I had met Tracy at my birthday celebration during healthier times. The party favor was a fifteen minute Tarot card reading and I loved the way Tracy combined her psychology degree with intuitive skills.  Continue reading →

Listening Post 2011

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Realitynibs is taking some time for hibernation. I need to settle into my new place, put the finishing touches on the Realitynibs.com Sponsorship Program and plan my 2011 healing. I don’t know whether I’ll be completely recovered by the end of the year but I will be better than I am now.

All these things take money, so I will be working on ensuring that too! In the meantime I’d love to hear from you. What have you liked best about Realitynibs.com? What about least? Do make good use of the comment box below! Continue reading →

Twelve Chronic Fatigue Triggers and Their Gifts

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I happened to reconnect with my father’s sister shortly after I first fell sick six years ago. I hadn’t seen her since I was about seven years old. When I was having difficulty recovering from surgery about a year later, she mentioned that she’d gone through something similar. She too had undergone a myomectomy as a young woman and found herself unable to function afterwards. “How will I ever return to my law practice if I can’t even read the newspaper?” she’d asked herself. It took about six months but she eventually got better.

I now recognize her symptoms as meeting the minimum definition of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome which suggests that I have (1)a genetic predisposition to this disease. Not only did reconnecting with her give me access to this information, I managed to summon the courage to tell her about the inexplicable, special connection I have always felt with her. ❑She told me she’d always felt the same way… Continue reading →

Professional Organizer Meets Chronic Fatigue!

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Welcome to the first Realitynibs.com podcast!

Please click image or here to listen to this podcast.

“As children we’re often pushed by our parents and teachers and with good reason. Like mother earth … they want us to fly. And it can be difficult to understand when someone does not need a push, they’ve developed invisible limitations.”

Margaret Lukens helped me a lot during the first few years of my dealing with Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia. For most of that time, I simply didn’t know what was wrong with me. In this first Realitynibs.com podcast, she had many insightful things to say about handling chronic illness both from the patient’s point of view and from the perspective of friends and relatives. It was nice to have a good laugh about things that had been quite serious when they took place! Continue reading →